Oh What a Week it Has Been

Welcome to the latest installment of the bias-filled, clearly-written-by-an-unabashed-homer, weekly review of college football.

College Football channeled its inner Miami Heat this week with not one, not two, not three -- you get the idea -- 7 upsets! There were no matchups between ranked opponents this week, but that didn’t stop 7 Top 25 teams from losing, including four Top 10 teams.

Clemson and my beloved Mike Leach-coached Washington State started off the week by losing to unranked dumpster fires on the road. If only the number two and 8 teams would have lost, this week it would been pretty incredible.

But Auburn and Washington said, “Hold our beers.” Auburn losing to LSU on the road wasn’t nearly as shocking as Washington losing at ASU while only scoring 7 points. There were even some idiot analysts (me) who thought the Huskies would go into the playoffs undefeated.

Not to be left off the hook, Texas Tech, SDSU and Navy all dropped games to unranked opponents.

Also, for the record, the Gators lost again, and Miami should have lost to Georgia Tech. I just thought I should mention that for journalistic integrity, not because of any personal vendetta or something childish like that.

As for my beloved Florida State Seminoles, they dominated poor little Duke University on both side of the ball by an awe inspiring score of 17-10. Wait, we only beat Duke by 7? 7?! Are you f***ing kidding me? 7 points? Somebody call Falcor the Luckdragon because this season feels like a never-ending story.

So after this week, who are the top ten teams in the country?

Alabama – Well, color me shocked. Alabama thrashed another inferior opponent at home. The unfortunate victim was Arkansas, and this week, the sacrificial lamb is Tennessee, who’ll be starting a true freshman QB in Tuscaloosa. Please, let’s all bow our heads in a moment of silence.
Georgia – They gave up 28 points to a feisty Missouri team, but Georgia comes in at number 2 for me because I believe they have the best win of anyone in the top 10. Their week 2 win over Notre Dame improves in significance each week the Irish keep winning. This week Georgia travels to Gainesville, and I can’t wait to watch the demolition of what’s left of Florida’s SEC title hopes.
Penn State – The Lions of Nittany get their first test this week when the fighting Khakis come to town. I think Barkley will have a big game, and Penn State will win. But I would not be upset if they lost. The most delusional fan base in the country needs a taste of reality. It’s more likely that comes next week at The Horseshoe.
TCU – The Horned Frogs just keep winning. They get to take this week off because they are scheduled to play the Jayhawks of Kansas, who might be the worst football program in division 1.
Wisconsin – The Badgers haven’t beat anyone of significance, but they are one of the few remaining early season favorites who haven’t lost in inexplicable fashion. Their next opponent, Maryland, at least has a pulse, so we will see if they’re the next top 10 team due for a letdown.
Miami – I have a pit in my stomach after ranking Miami this high. I don’t know if they are the 6th best team in the country, but they keep winning. They have studs on defense and a talented corps of wide receivers. I think they now should be favorites in the ACC until Clemson proves it has its act together.

7-10 In some order: Clemson, Ohio State, Oklahoma, and Notre Dame. They all have one loss. They all can be impressive at times and confusing at others; Oklahoma is the only one of the bunch that has an established QB. I believe they are all still alive for a playoff spot but wouldn’t be surprised at all if none of them made it.

Every week we will give out a few recognitions and superlatives, some traditional and some not so much. This is the little site that could, so we will call these awards The Rudys, after the little football player that could.

Breakout Performance: Khalil Tate – He is going to stay in this spot until he stops putting up ridiculous numbers. Following his surprising record breaking performance last week, Tate gave an encore performance of 230 yards rushing on 15 carries, with two TDs and a 9/13 for 148 yards, with one TD and zero turnovers.

Game of The Week: USC needed to stop a two-point conversion with 42 seconds left to sneak past the Utes of Utah 28-27. USC trailed 21-7 at the half, and QB Sam Darnold led three late scoring drives to take the lead. After being shut out for the entire second half, Utah’s final drive went for 75 yards and ended with a two-yard scamper by QB Troy Williams. Utah decided to go for the win instead of playing for overtime. They were stopped a yard short, which allowed USC to keep their dwindling playoff hopes alive.

Coach with the Hottest Seat: in my Bruce Buffer voice: AND STILL Jim Mcelwain. How long can Florida keep putting terrible offenses on the field before a jort-clad riot breaks out in the swamp? (I will keep putting this here until it is not true). Honorable mention Gus Malzan.